Not too long ago, I was sitting in a car, talking with a friend of mine. We were outside his house and I was double parked; however, I was pulled over enough so that people could get by me. The few people who drove up the street did just that without so much as a [...] [...more]
April 21 was Administrative Professionals Day. If you’re a boss with a hardworking assistant, I hope you did the right thing and took good care of the person who takes good care of you all year long. My day job—when I’m not doing all this written-word business—is as an administrative assistant (I prefer to say [...] [...more]
I wasn’t even 10 years old, but I was sure Michael Sergio was the coolest person ever. It was game 6 of the 1986 World Series, and the New York Mets were trailing the Boston Red Sox three games to two. Sergio cut through the October night sky, navigating his way down to Shea Stadium [...] [...more]
By James Barone | jb@submergemag.com I’m toeing a difficult line between gym rat and fat ass. I’ve gotten quite hooked on going to the gym, but I can’t stop myself from eating. In fact, I think I eat more now than ever. Is that a good thing? I keep hearing that you should eat more often, [...] [...more]
James Barone jb@submergemag.com I hate Sundays more than any other day. It’s not so much because it’s the end of the weekend and it signifies that oft-maligned Monday looms ever closer. I like Mondays. I like working. I’m sure that makes me somewhat of a freak; but believe me, that’s just one thing on a rather long [...] [...more]
James Barone jb@submergemag.com Like most well- to highly educated people in the world, I like to think of myself as a smarty pants. I find that I often have to limit the flow of the font of information that will gush from my brain and out of my mouth so I don’t sound like an asshole in [...] [...more]
James Barone jb@submergemag.com If you read this column at all, you know I’m into metal. So by proxy, that makes me a bit interested in Satan. It’s an interest, but not a full-blown obsession. I’m not going to start conducting séances, fucking with ouija boards or burning black candles on the Sabbath. That could be movie bullshit, [...] [...more]
James Barone jb@submergemag.com Another holiday season has passed. This is always a difficult time of year for me. It’s back to work, back to reality and 12 more months before it once again becomes socially acceptable to say fuck off to all responsibility and eat and booze as much as your heart desires. I usually do that [...] [...more]
By James Barone jb@submergemag.com Many years ago, when I was working at the comic book store, I tried to be as courteous to our customers as possible. Most of the time, I knew who would come in (and in most cases, when), but around the holidays, as you’d imagine, our clientele became more diverse. It was no [...] [...more]
By James Barone jb@submergemag.com Oh, Carrie. It seems that our dethroned Miss California is determined to keep stoking the fires of her bullshit celebrity status since she spoke out against same-sex marriage during this year’s Miss U.S.A. Pageant. I should say right off the bat that I support same-sex marriages. We are all equal under the law, [...] [...more]
