Opinion

They say an emergency lies in the eye of the beholder. Actually, no one says that, but judging by President Trump’s latest decree, he sure seems to think that’s the case. If you haven’t heard, the president recently declared a national emergency over illegal immigration at the Mexican border. He…

Did anyone else see Representative Jerry Nadler, D-NY and head of the House Judiciary Committee, spar against acting Attorney General, and owner of world’s largest head, Matt Whitaker this past week? If you haven’t, I suggest you do. It was like Thunderdome for grumpy white dudes. There was one particularly…

Did you know that, if you have enough money, you can create your own holiday? A perfect example of such a holiday falls in the middle of the month of February every year, and we call it Valentine’s Day. Valentine’s Day is supposed to be about love, but it’s really…

Things are clearly broken in Washington D.C. It’s been over a month since Lord Trump decreed that he was taking his ball home until he got his border wall money. That means that 800,000 government employees haven’t gotten a paycheck in over a month, and quite a few of them…

In the past, I’ve made donations—small ones, because I’m not rolling in it—to Democratic candidates and other causes that I believe in. I don’t regret doing these things. It makes me feel good to put my money where my mouth is, so to speak, and support whatever or whoever I…

For most of you, 2019 is a real big mystery. What will happen to all the celebrities? What terrible things are in store for us in the coming year? What misguided fashion trends are we going to resurrect to make ourselves look ridiculous once again? What new gadgets will change…

I think we can all agree that 2018 has been a rough year. It seemed like every week a new disaster or crisis was ready to tear the world apart. Frankly, it’s been exhausting, so hopefully, 2019 will be our chance to change that. I believe that a large majority…

There are assassins amongst us. Since 2016, someone or something has been fucking with our diplomats in Cuba. These diplomats have reported being on the receiving end of “sonic attacks” that damaged their hearing, as well as caused dizziness, pain and ringing in their ears. The phenomenon has baffled researchers…

During my frequent Instagram scrolls (which can last for a mere minute or so, or stretch nearly a half-hour) this past week, I’ve noticed a lot of people posting their adieus to 2018, which certainly was an eventful year. This was both a pro and con: As someone who regularly…

Roald Dahl was a literary genius and mad scientist. His books were some of the craziest things I read as a child. My favorite was probably Charlie and the Chocolate Factory. At the time, I thought Charlie was such a lucky kid. Who wouldn’t want to inherit this amazing chocolate…